I love the peacefulness that the stillness of the night has to offer. My creativity tends to flow better and I also love time with God then too. Yes, the fears that the night times bring are also conquered as I’m alert then – and able to have a good rest in the early hours of the morning yes lapping over into the morning too.
My next door neighbour knows my ways.. and she knows as soon as I am up, I open all the windows. As I was plonked on the sofa working on my book late this morning, with my mug of steaming hot coffee, the door bell rang. It was my neighbour armed with a covered foil container accompanied with a smaller plastic container. I just asked her whether it was ‘manioc’ (cassava – a type of yam) that is popular for breakfast with a sambol (made of chillies, onions, coconut and lime juice). She was shocked and asked how I knew. I sheepishly replied that I had prayed for it yesterday as I had suddenly had a craving to eat it. No, unfortunately I didn’t take a photo of what she brought. My mind was fixated on that – as soon as I finished the section of the book I was working on, I bounced up and savoured every mouthful!
God reminded me that He cares for our every little desire. In fact, it was a rebuke in one sense for me as much as an assurance. My expenses have been higher than usual these last couple of months. Visa renewal, the season to extend hospitality, my birthday, wrist injury which meant buying food from out and travelling by a three wheeler not public transport and more trips to do groceries instead of walking.. the expenses added up big time. In addition to all this were added ministry commitments which meant travelling to meetings and then relevant dress codes for that too. Stationery requirements were also added in order to help with the research work and book writing.
Suddenly panic began to hit with all these mounting expenses that I began to act in fear and hold back on spending. I kept concentrating on my bank balance and making sure there was sufficient balance for the rent to be paid and thus held back on my needs and held back on further ministry expenses. I was getting a bit worried, agitated too I must admit, confess even.
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life” – Matthew 6:25-27
Today God was reminding me that He has indeed carried me through for over 10 years of living by faith. He reminded me that He was teaching me to spend what is needed in faith too instead of being stingy and holding back. By sending the food to my doorstep (reminds me of what I wrote in my last blog post that the KEY can fall on the doorstep) He reminded me that He knows even the little things that I crave for and that He can provide it in any means. I thank God for the obedience of my next door neighbour in responding to the nudging so that God could show Himself to be real.
So yes, now I have to go out and make the purchases of toiletries, medication, laundry needs, food items that need to be replenished and continue to work on the required wardrobe.. I need to take a step in faith knowing that He knows and He will step in when necessary.. That my finances aren’t in my bank balance but they are ushered in from the floodgates of heaven through His vessels whether as cash or as the resource itself.
Goodness how ungrateful am I that I need to panic and fear.. When will I be able to walk smoothly in faith without having to apply the brakes?
My desire is to be able to smoothly drive on the highways of faith
without having to press on the brakes of fear
knowing the highway is held in His Sovereign righteous hand!
God, we so need Your grace to walk in ways of faith pleasing YOU!